keep your relationship tasting like sweet vanilla ice cream 🍦

or turn it into rotten spoiled clumpy bacteria filled milk

♥︎ Your boyfriend, your man, your fiancé, your husband, your partner…

Is meant to be your hobby ☻︎

Your ideas, your journal, your brand, your book, your artistic passions…⬇️

Is meant to be your soul mate ♥︎✧♥︎✧♥︎✧༛༛༛

All you do is worry about your relationship! You are so hyper fixated on “what he is doing”.

His moods, his actions, how he spoke to you, what he did that day or not, how he behaved when you went out drinking, the tone he texted you back in.

Girl. Give it a fucking break.

But….I know that is easier said than done because in your mind you’re thinking you can’t help it.

The only reason you’re like this is because………….

You’re bored.

Idle hands are indeed the devil’s playground 👹🛝

(I like to say an idle MIND is the devil’s playground).

Think back to a time in life when you were so0o0o0 obsessed with your own life. You were so in-love with what you were doing. Maybe you had the best girlfriends and went out for girly drinks and apps every Friday night then spent Sunday’s deep in ritual. Or maybe there was a time in your life where you were so0o0o obsessed with your mind that you took a month to write a book and you woke up so excited everyday to work on it. Or that time when you finally felt ready to create a social media brand and you got so into it taking professional photos and curating your offers.

If you’re in a relationship….your work is to get back to that ⬆️

And if you’ve never had a time in your life where you felt that way. Well honey bee 🍯✧༛🐝 that’s your work.

Your life is NOT meant to be about your boyfriend!

All of these teachings are coming from someone who has been in a relationship for nearly 7 years and has lived together with my man the entire time. I view my man as my soul mate. I don’t vision a life where we are not together. I see my man as my best friend, as my soul mate, and as my partner in life. We have a shared group of friends. We do a LOT together as a couple. Our lives are indeed very intertwined. We are verrrryyy involved in each other’s lives.

And….

I have made sure to always have my own room 💖✧✧🍦 I have an affair with my art 🎨♡༛ (meaning, I don’t bring him into my art…he doesn’t know what I am working on and I don’t consult him about it) 💞 I don’t force him to understand my work or my business 🧞‍♀️✧𖦹🫧 I don’t need him to “get it” 👩🏼‍💻♡💞 I have ALWAYS kept my own morning routine and make him wait if we have things to do together (like I journal and write every single morning) 🍰༛🫧 and I always expressed my freak flag in front of him…like doing psychic readings on myself in the beginning of our relationship when we didn’t know each other like that or doing EFT on myself in front of him 🔮✧𖦹💕 when I wrote my book I woke up early at 5am every single morning and committed myself to writing at least 1,000 words every single day and never once told him about it in my 3 months of writing it 🤓🫧✧♡🩷 I did after the fact but I made a promise to me + my inner being to create a sacred connection between me + my art ♾️༛🫧༛🍰 and it was actually through THAT summer where all my teachings birthed and I have been talking about the same concepts since the summer of 2022!

➡️ go deep with your art and boys are for fun! 🤹✧🫧💖✰✰

We got together in 2019 and I was still being my full self but I wasn’t treating my art like my boyfriend yet. I suffered deeply with anxious attachment and insecurity. I genuinely believed I was ugly. I would go through his likes on IG or try to catch him following IG models….I would panic all day if he didn’t text me back in a timely manner. If he went out without me I felt anxious all day and all night. I was always worried he was going to leave me. I never felt good until he validated me.

And I was soooo sick of my own shit. I hated being that way. It felt like ugly behavior and I didn’t want to identify with being ugly anymore. I kept reading relationship self help content. I had a mental health coach. I kept trying to solve my issues with him and sit him down for “chats” where we would loop in conversation for hours. I talked to him like a therapist 🫠 Using that type of language and everything. always letting him know “what’s wrong” blah blah blah.

and looking back, ya bitch was bored as fuck. she had nothing better to do than to bug her boyfriend.

We went to Spain, Italy, and Switzerland in the summer of 2022. I made a promise to myself I just wanted to let myself have fun and let loose (I was still wrapped up in holistic healing, holistic eating, hyper spiritual concepts). But I was SOo00o0o mizzzzz.

Anyways…..we got to Italy and every single meal we ate was the best thing I had ever had in my life. I let myself “go loose” because “we were on vacation” and it was like I enjoyed food for the first time in my entire life (realizing after the fact I was indeed struggling with an eating disorder my whole life with all the rules and restrictions).

And for the first time everrrr I released resistance in my physical body where I actually felt relief for what it felt like the first time….ever? I am not lying when I say this but I cried of happiness over every single meal I ate and every drink I drank.

It was insane happiness and I realized what I had been depriving myself of….

(this is important to understand ⬆️)

BECAUSE I felt relief in my body and felt at ease with myself….

I believe I opened up my channel 🔮༛✧✧🧞‍♀️

In a way that had neverrrrrrr been opened before

(even though I was meditating daily and worked as a Psychic doing readings almost every single day).

And so here I am in Italy feeling at ease with myself (again for the first time ever) and I was just happy as a clam. We were taking a train from one part of Italy to the next and I had a notebook with me. And in an instant my entireeeeee body of work was downloaded to me. I filled up pages upon pages upon pages around everything I write about today.

you’re not insecure, you’re bored.

you’re not jealous, you just have unclaimed desires.

go deep with your art, boys are for fun.

but it was paragraphs and paragraphs just a stream of consciousness flying through me.

Once we got home from Italy that is when I sat down at my laptop and wrote thousands of words every single day and told not ONE soul about it. I had 80k worth of content and I was going to publish it into a book but I used that content to actually make my SUBSTACK HERE ! (I have 2 publications ~ Creative Love + Miracle Zone). It was everything I write about in Creative Love.

Creative Love led me to starting Miracle Zone….

Miracle Zone brought me to UPWARD SPiRAL (my manifestation membership)…..

And these 2 bodies of work (Creative Love + Miracle Zone) became my entire brand’s essence and it’s been the vibe of my work ever since summer of 2022!

Every single piece led into the next creation 🍰༛༛🫧

OHHHHH annnnnnd

after spending the whole summer writing my secret book….it literally HEALED my anxious attachment and I have not resonated with anxious attachment since then. Seriously. Nothing.

My anxious attachment was so bad that when I saw another beautiful woman it would ruin my whole day (I used to self harm). I had the worst anxiety about going to the gym because I knew if I saw a pretty girl it would ruin my whole day.

That’s how bad it was.

So I used all my energy that I used to worry about others and I made myself hot 🌬️💕🪞♡♡༛💖 or rather I spent time getting to know myself and figure out my signature look and figure out what type of baseline I always want to be at. I used all my energy I spent worrying about “my boyfriend” and went deep as fuck with my art instead.

And now I am financially independent from my passions 🌈🫧💕

I have a healthy relationship 👩‍❤️‍👨💖

but most importantly I am FREE in my own mind 🫧

I eat what I want 🍰✧🫧 I drink alcohol without guilt 🥂𖦹 I HAVE FUN with my man 👩‍❤️‍👨💕༛ and I don’t force him to go deep or get my work…and NATURALLY we are deep because I stopped forcing it ♡💖 and yes I am obbbbssssessssed with my work (which is my art) my writing, my digital art, the spaces I hold online.

And I don’t spiral if we do fight. I don’t spiral if something feels off or wrong. I just use it as data. I don’t make meaning from it. I don’t EVER take action with a muddied mind. I find alignment first. I have been devoted to alignment versus making decisions for the past 4 years and only good has come from it.

♥︎♥︎ But as a self aware, intelligent, intuitive, and high achiever woman…..♥︎♥︎

you will naturally worry about your relationship….

you’ll worry about “if he is right for you”

you’ll worry about if the relationship is in “alignment”

you’ll feel really guilty if you get in a fight or he shows a behavior that is “not in alignment” because “aren’t you more evolved than that”….

So maybe you don’t struggle with that anxious attachment type of anxiety anymore but now you worry about the “alignment” of your relationship and sometimes make yourself sick over wondering if he is the one or not or if you’re wasting your time because you’re a high value woman…

And let me tell you right now ~

The ONLY times I felt this way ⬆️ is when I was not currently obsessed with my own life + art. It’s the times when I was more focused on his behavior than my own artistic obsessions. It’s when I was being lazy with my mind and just allowing myself to ruminate over the relationship versus going deep with my own channel 🧞‍♀️✧🔮༛

And the really beautiful part around unplugging your mind from the relationship and plugging your mind into your art and passions is that your relationship will naturally come back into alignment when you stop trying to force the alignment. The sex naturally becomes so deep and he ravishes you…Or you notice the energy shift between the 2 of you where there is an unspoken sweetness that exists…or he just naturally shows up in the ways you had been praying for.

But the minute you “need” him to behave in a certain way is the minute the relationship unravels back into anxiety and disharmony.

you “need” to understand that you don’t “need” shit from him.

you’re a powerful fucking goddess. come on. ☪︎

stop depending on him to make you feel good.

Remove the concept of “needing him to meet your needs” what kind of bullshit is that? You’re giving power to something and someone outside of you? EW! Stop! ☻︎

you need to unplug from your relationship. not in a way where you’re giving up. but in a way where you stop letting your mind obsess over it or you sit him down to have these serious chats.

if you want your relationship to be SEXY and fun and feel good…take my advice.

if you want your relationship to feel like a serious therapy session then carry on with what you’re doing with always trying to get your “needs met”.

My work is for those who are ready to put on their big girl panties. My work is for those who came here to be an intuitive powerful goddess who values ALIGNMENT with self over making erratic decisions when you feel anxious or off. My work is for those who are overrrrr depending on anyone else to “feel good” (clients, followers, lovers).

What I see most people doing:

★ you get in a fight with your boyfriend when you’re drunk so now you go sober and make him go sober with you.

★ you feel sick after eating gluten so you tell everyone you’re gluten intolerant and never eat a pastry again.

★ you hate your boss then you quit your job.

★ you don’t like the city you move in so you get up and move before everything gets organized.

★ you drank too much over the weekend now being a psycho and doing 75 hard (sorry I have so much beef with 75 hard lmao)

Allllllll of that is coming out of a state of not being regulated!

And look SOMETIMES these actions are going to result in a better life.

but your patterns + shadow self are always going to follow you 👹 🕳️ like a fucking shadow lol ☻︎☻︎☻︎☻︎☻︎☻︎☻︎

You try to find alignment via action.

You’ll never actually feel the best you when you do that.

I teach finding alignment FIRST and then allowing the Universe to guide your path ✧✧

you don’t need to make erratic decisions when you don’t feel good. In fact, it usually backfires.

if alcohol is not meant to be a part of your life anymore you’re going to just naturally stop drinking but you don’t need to announce it like this whole thing where you’re so intense about and its your whole identity. There is a 3rd option where you can just choose not to drink at certain events but also not be married to anything in life…maybe you will want to have a drink again and that’s also going to be ok…

If your man is not meant to be in your life anymore your paths will just naturally separate and you both will come to some mutual decision about it all… you don’t need to sit up in bed all night worried and making yourself sick about it. If he is truly not in alignment for you…it’s going to be agreed upon if you find alignment with yourself first ♥︎

If you really want to lose weight and tone up you don’t need to commit to 75 hard and put yourself through a major fucking cortisol spike (that will probably hold your body fat more than anything….) and you’ll just binge eat after it’s all done….just find alignment with yourself and your body will naturally shed the fat! You’ll be all the sudden inspired to lift heavier or go on a run or make healthier desserts.

I just see most people have this “ALL OR NOTHINGGGGGGGG” mindset which is soooo rooted in this black and way thinking.

I love applying the vegan bacon mindset to my own life and have been living this way for years.

The vegan bacon mindset is “being vegan but still eating bacon” (it was a trend that was talked about on TikTok). It’s to help those who are so intense and don’t let theirselves find a fun 3rd option to life. But what is this shit with an ALLLLL OR NOTHINGGGG mindset like all yall are doing is keeping yourself in these mental prisons.

Life is FOR FUNNNNNNN and FEEEELING GOOOOOOOOD!

Like if you want to stop eating meat but you looooove cheese burgers then stop eating meat but still eat cheese burgers?

If you want to be sober but also want to drink on occasions just drink on special occasions?…

If you want to stop having caffeine but loooove the feeling of getting a latte at the bookshop then just get the latte at the bookshop?

If you want to only be engaged with holistic healing and be all natural but ibuprofen really help you with your cramps…..take the fucking ibprofen 😭

If you want to be a crunchy mom and be crunchy with everything in life BUT you love botox…..lol get the damn botox.

There is always a more fun + easier way to living your life where you aren’t trapped in this mental prisons of restriction and rules and blah blah blah.

and really….I am here for the people who can understand and trust these 3rd FUN options. you get to do what you want in life to make yourself feel better whether that is be sober, be holistic, do intense workouts, quit caffeine but you need to understand the roots behind these actions and also not be so married to anything.

Because what happens is you stop trusting yourself and the universe. Like you put your allll into these identity titles where with over time you will feel boxed in and there will be more quilt if you ever wanted to engage with a certain activity again.

Anyways, my work is for those who do have an all or nothing mindset and so ready to make life feel good and have fun again. and today (5.4) I am starting a 3 week portal to ALIGN to your inner being (and not take erratic action) but rather align to the voice of your Inner Being so any action you doooo take is feel good, fun, and in alignment.

my spaces keep your relationship tasting like sweet vanilla ice cream.

My spaces keep your LIFE tasting like sweet vanilla ice cream.

We go deeeeeeeep as fuck but really it’s to just have fun 🌈🫧🥂

In love and upward spiiiiiiraaaalllls,

SAMMi

🍰🫧